Gone, But Not Forgotten

“Men are afraid that women will laugh at them. Women are afraid that men will kill them.” ~ Margaret Atwood

Quite often, as a Haudenosaunee woman, an Indigenous feminist and someone who is dedicated personally and professionally to combating violence against women (VAW) I am constantly faced with opposition. Folks that want to tell me that I am over exaggerating. That I’m blowing things out of proportion. That the situation isn’t really that bad. That the world we live in as women isn’t deliberately designed to be stacked against us, and to pit us against each other. That systemic racism doesn’t exist, that the epidemic of MMIW isn’t real. That the information I’m providing must be false, or elaborated in some way. That a survivor of an attack must have done something to deserve it.

One of the most frustrating things that I encounter is when I am told that regardless of my own lived experiences, regardless of those lived experiences of the women in my life, that it’s not that bad.
IT IS EXACTLY ‘THAT BAD’!

So I’ve decided to collect shared stories and experiences. I’m not going to search them out. I will only include examples of women being killed that I come across on my social media. I feel this should speak to the shear magnitude of experience out there. To the overwhelming number of lives lost. To the urgency of this issue.

My thoughts and prayers are with all of our stolen sisters and their families. You are not forgotten!

***TW FOR VIOLENCE, SEXISM, RACISM, HOMOPHOBIA, TRANSPHOBIA, POLICE BRUTALITY 

In Loving Memory – Women We’ve Lost

Mayang Prasetyo’s – http://lgbtfeed.com/post/transgender_sex_worker_killed_and_cooked_by_chef_husbandwtf

Tiarah Poyau – http://www.dailymail.co.uk/~/article-3777279/index.html

Mary “Unique” Spears’  – http://jezebel.com/woman-shot-and-killed-after-refusing-to-give-man-her-ph-1643634425

Misty Upham – http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/body-found-search-actress-misty-upham-n227796

Rose Downwind – http://www.fox9.com/news/56820390-story

Kelsey Annese (and Matthew Hutchinson) – http://jezebel.com/student-at-suny-geneseo-murders-ex-girlfriend-and-frien-1753646164

Gynnya McMillen – https://photographyisnotacrime.com/2016/01/31/kentucky-girl-dies-in-custody-of-juvenile-detention-center/

Azraya Kokopenace – http://m.chroniclejournal.com/news/local/kenora-teens-body-found-in-park/article_52f68930-0501-11e6-805e-7f079531478e.html?mode=jqm

Nadine Machiskinic – http://www.cbc.ca/missingandmurdered/mmiw/profile/nadine-machiskinic?cmp=abfb

Mayor Gisela Mota (one day after taking office) – http://www.cbc.ca/beta/news/world/mexico-mayor-murder-1.3387441

Chericia Brown – http://abc7chicago.com/1301481/

Kourtney Yochum – http://www.autostraddle.com/kourtney-yochum-becomes-the-7th-trans-person-murdered-this-year-we-find-ourselves-asking-the-same-old-questions-332736/

Monica Loera – http://jezebel.com/monica-loera-is-the-first-known-trans-woman-killed-in-2-1756169296?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

Christy Ramone Crane – http://www.albertapolicereport.ca/2015/12/07/maskwacis-rcmp-attend-serious-incident-update-1/

Destiny Rae Tom – http://www.cbc.ca/missingandmurdered/mmiw/profile/destiny-rae-tom?cmp=abfb

Teresa Robinson (11 years old) – http://www.cbc.ca/beta/news/canada/manitoba/teresa-robinson-killing-arrest-garden-hill-first-nation-1.3496152

Sheridan Hookimaw – http://aptn.ca/news/2015/12/10/body-of-girl-13-found-by-police-in-attawapiskat/

E’Dena Hines – http://jezebel.com/e-dena-hines-granddaughter-of-morgan-freeman-fatally-s-1724434193?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

Sara Mutschlechner – http://jezebel.com/sorority-sister-fatally-shot-while-serving-as-designate-1750849270?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

Mia Henderson – http://m.wbaltv.com/news/body-found-in-northwest-baltimore/26981292#ixzz37nC8slqs

CJ Fowler – http://cfnrfm.ca/girl-learned-she-was-pregnant-just-before-she-was-killed/

Reeva Steenkamp – http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/kat-lister/reeva-steenkamp-simon-jenkins_b_6021076.html

Jane Doe – http://www.cbc.ca/m/news/canada/manitoba/winnipeg-police-say-a-body-was-pulled-from-the-red-river-1.2800233

Tugce Albayrak – http://jezebel.com/german-student-dies-after-defending-teen-girls-from-ha-1664902351?rev=1417382756517&utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

Alejandra Leos – http://wreg.com/2014/09/05/woman-riding-bike-shot-killed/

Rose Downwind – http://www.valleynewslive.com/home/headlines/Bemidji-woman-died-from-strangulation-367484091.html?device=phone&c=y

Gail Fawcett – http://aptn.ca/news/2015/07/22/aboriginal-woman-identified-as-ottawas-latest-homicide-victim/

Mary Johnny – http://aptn.ca/news/2014/10/20/inquest-rules-first-nations-womans-death-a-homicide-experts-question-medical-care/

Angelia Mangum and Tjhisha Ball – http://www.ebony.com/news-views/black-teen-girls-killed-but-do-you-care-403#axzz3E5rXXwqa

Chelsea Yellowbird – http://edmontonjournal.com/news/local-news/two-alberta-men-sentenced-to-prison-in-2011-chelsea-yellowbird-murder

Amber Lynn Schraw – http://jezebel.com/police-investigating-possible-4chan-link-in-murder-of-w-1654933074?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

Jane Doe – http://jezebel.com/california-woman-dies-after-being-doused-in-gasoline-an-1749786360?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

Aniya Parker – http://m.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fcolorlines.com%2Farchives%2F2014%2F10%2Fmourners_remember_aniya_parker_trans_woman_killed_in_los_angeles.html&h=OAQG0UQnl&s=1&enc=AZPZW1hYobuFFqm8HSTqr8QN0kLPLFovt7Jp4Rd51QxPL1ZvIjVU9T1BTd2f7an_CbQCre0t8wQkENnG2o1NR0k0

Jane Doe (New Brunswick) – http://www.rcmp-grc.gc.ca/nb/news-nouvelles/releases-communiques/14-10-27-130211-eng.htm

Maria Del Rosario Fuentes Rubio – http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2014/10/21/she-tweeted-against-the-mexican-cartels-they-tweeted-her-murder.html?via=newsletter&source=CSMorning&utm_content=buffer24e46&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook.com&utm_campaign=buffer

Brooklyn Moose – http://cjme.com/article/218504/woman-found-dead-regina-attic-identified-brooklyn-moose

Grace Mann – http://wehuntedthemammoth.com/2015/05/10/feminist-activist-grace-mann-murdered-blogger-blames-her-death-on-feminist-jokes-about-misandry/

Adelle Morin (died in police custody) – http://aptn.ca/news/2014/11/19/first-nations-family-demands-rcmp-tell-daughter-died-jail-cell/

Nadia Ezaldein – http://jezebel.com/woman-shot-and-killed-at-nordstrom-was-scared-to-get-pr-1667049269?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

Lamia Beard – http://www.pghlesbian.com/2015/01/trans-woman-of-color-lamia-beard-murdered-in-norfolk/

Yaz’Min Shancez, Mia Henderson* (above as well), Kandy Hall, Tiffany Edwards, Ashley Sherman – http://www.forharriet.com/2014/11/we-speak-their-names-for-black-trans.html

Deidre Patayash – http://aptn.ca/news/2014/11/19/opp-investigating-death-first-nation-mother-found-hotel-room/

Teresa Casandra Robinson, only 11 years old… – http://aptn.ca/news/2015/05/15/rcmp-treating-death-11-year-old-garden-hill-first-nation-girl-homicide/

Victoria Crow Shoe – http://globalnews.ca/news/2226358/body-of-victoria-crow-shoe-found-along-oldman-river/

Stephanie Moseley – http://jezebel.com/the-wild-horrific-murder-of-stephanie-moseley-1669000718?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

Shaneka Thompson, Kristy Flowers, (Stephanie Moseley) – http://www.forharriet.com/2014/12/for-stephanie-shaneka-and-kristy-we.html?m=1

Ralkina Jones – http://shine.forharriet.com/2015/07/37-year-old-ralkina-jones-dies-in.html?m=1

Deshawnda “Tata” Sanchez – http://m.colorlines.com/archives/2014/12/black_trans_woman_killed_while_pounding_on_compton_door_for_help.html

Angela Poorman – http://m.theglobeandmail.com/news/national/family-of-slain-winnipeg-woman-support-aboriginal-women-inquiry/article22099769/?service=mobile&cmpid=rss1

Danielle Nyland – https://redpowermedia.wordpress.com/2015/06/21/rcmp-find-body-of-missing-metis-woman-near-shellbrook-sask/

Karina Wolfe – http://www.cbc.ca/beta/news/canada/saskatchewan/how-police-found-karina-wolfe-after-5-year-search-1.3343716

Keisha Jenkins – http://www.autostraddle.com/kiesha-jenkins-22-year-old-black-trans-woman-murdered-in-philadelphia-310761/

Jane Doe (Whitehorse, Indigenous Woman) – http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/north/first-nations-female-aged-16-to-20-found-dead-in-whitehorse-1.2866264

Mercedes Williamson – http://www.buzzfeed.com/dominicholden/transgender-teen-killed-in-mississippi#.rg2RDoY26

Roxanne Louie – http://globalnews.ca/news/1771754/updated-penticton-womans-body-found-near-naramata-sources-say/

Hiawayi Robinson (8) – http://www.forharriet.com/2014/12/alabama-da-murdered-8-year-old-died.html?m=1

Jennifer Laude – http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/6325232

Jane Doe (Regina) – http://www.cbc.ca/m/news/canada/saskatchewan/woman-29-found-fatally-injured-in-regina-hotel-police-investigating-1.2899826

Monica Lee Burns – http://globalnews.ca/news/1779992/foul-play-suspected-after-woman-found-dead-on-sask-snowmobile-trail/?hootPostID=1ba2a8d7563b5fd3b4fe2d802f8785fa

Shantai and Kayla Warren, Viola Warren – http://www.forharriet.com/2015/01/father-commits-murder-suicide-after.html?m=1#axzz3Q9fJDR47

Ms.Edwards – http://transgriot.blogspot.ca/2015/01/another-african-american-trans-woman.html?m=1

Jane Doe (Edmonton) – http://www.ctvnews.ca/mobile/canada/woman-s-body-found-in-edmonton-alley-tied-up-in-shopping-cart-1.2426583

Britney Cosby and Crystal Jackson – http://shine.forharriet.com/2015/06/houston-man-charged-with-murder-of.html?m=1#axzz3dhJqR4hY

Taja Gabrielle DeJesus – http://www.buzzfeed.com/dominicholden/transgender-latina-woman-killed-in-san-francisco?s=mobile#.alee1M8DB

Jasmine Wright – http://shine.forharriet.com/2015/07/jasmine-wright-was-on-phone-with-her.html?m=1#axzz3gwsmaIp8

Zella Ziona – http://fusion.net/story/216335/transgender-woman-zella-ziona-killed-gaithersburg/?utm_source=twitter&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=FusionRSS

Danica Baxter and her three children, Reign, 

Ty Underwood – http://www.forharriet.com/2015/01/trans-woman-in-texas-killed-in-possible.html?m=1#axzz3QP5pBpBY

Jessica Miller – http://globalnews.ca/news/2109242/man-arrested-after-jessica-millers-body-found-near-saint-john/

Latoya Andrews, Joseph Brown, London Brown and Jeremiah Brown – http://shine.forharriet.com/2015/02/man-kills-ex-wife-her-new-boyfriend-and.html?m=1#axzz3RFva5zTW

Bri Golec – http://www.pghlesbian.com/2015/02/22-year-old-ohio-trans-woman-stabbed-to-death-by-father/

Paige – http://m.huffpost.com/ca/entry/7285374?&ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000063

Amber Monroe – http://www.autostraddle.com/amber-monroe-becomes-the-12-twoc-murdered-in-the-us-this-year-we-must-sayhername-done-301859/

Takita Mathieu – http://countercurrentnews.com/2015/02/woman-threatened-by-stalker-140-times-cops-refused-to-act-now-shes-dead/

Sarah Lee Circle Bear – http://www.colorlines.com/articles/native-woman-sarah-lee-circle-bear-died-police-custody-south-dakota

Sheneque Proctor – http://countercurrentnews.com/2014/12/sheneque-proctor-the-female-eric-garner/

Amber Tuccaro – http://www.theobserver.ca/2012/09/04/skull-found-near-edmonton-identified-as-mother-missing-since-2010

Mirjana Puhar – http://jezebel.com/top-model-contestant-mirjana-puhar-killed-in-triple-hom-1688016039?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

Jasilas Wright and Kaylan Ward – http://shine.forharriet.com/2015/06/two-new-orleans-teenagers-found-dead-on.html?m=1#axzz3dKHNwiyC

Christa Cachene – https://redpowermedia.wordpress.com/2015/10/13/family-have-identified-homicide-victim-found-in-calgary-home/

Sumaya Dalmar http://www.autostraddle.com/another-heartbreak-somali-canadian-trans-woman-sumaya-dalmar-found-dead-in-toronto-this-weekend-278564/

Nellie Angutiguluk – http://www.cbc.ca/m/news/canada/montreal/nellie-angutiguluk-s-death-ruled-a-homicide-1.3135455

Ashley Hallstrom – http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2015/10/22/trans-woman-ashley-hallstrom-let-my-suicide-be-a-lesson.html?utm_content=buffer89128&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook.com&utm_campaign=buffer

http://odofemi.tumblr.com/post/111862412206/this-is-sumaya-ysl-a-twoc-friend-of-mine-found

Survivors – Those Still With Us

Jane Doe (Philadelphia) – http://www.nbcphiladelphia.com/news/local/Woman-Ignores-Man-Slashed-Queens-Building-Lobby-278467001.html?_osource=SocialFlowTwt_PHBrand

Jane Doe (Brooklyn) – http://indiancountrytodaymedianetwork.com/2014/10/23/brutally-attacked-native-transgender-woman-can-finally-speak-again-157486

Jane Doe (Kentucky) – http://jezebel.com/man-chokes-woman-he-met-online-because-she-didnt-match-1651059605?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

Two Jane Does (Toronto) – http://www.reddit.com/r/toronto/comments/2l2w00/two_girls_mugged_and_brutally_beaten_in/

Monica Contreras – http://tellmenow.com/2014/10/cop-sexually-assaults-hot-girl-inside-courtroom-then-this-happens/

Carlesha Freeland-Gaither – http://www.nbcphiladelphia.com/news/local/Abducted-Woman-Found-Alive-in-Maryland-Police-Source-281698261.html

Lana Sinclair (police brutality) – http://www.cbc.ca/m/news/canada/manitoba/injuries-happened-at-the-hands-of-winnipeg-police-woman-alleges-1.2828354

Rinelle Harper – http://www.ctvnews.ca/mobile/canada/teen-recovering-after-being-assaulted-dumped-in-winnipeg-river-1.2097226

Jane Doe (Chicago) – http://jezebel.com/man-viciously-attacks-woman-for-refusing-to-give-him-he-1666424378?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

Jane Doe (etobicoke) – http://m.citynews.ca/2014/12/09/woman-violently-robbed-sexually-assaulted-at-etobicoke-hotel/

6 year old girl, Alexis Nakota Sioux Nation – http://www.cbc.ca/m/news/canada/edmonton/attempted-murder-sexual-assault-charges-laid-in-beating-of-girl-1.2881550

Jane Doe, France – http://mobile.todayszaman.com/latest-news_pregnant-muslim-woman-attacked-in-paris-loses-baby_318574.html

Veronica Bolina – http://www.gaystarnews.com/article/brazil-trans-woman-stripped-shaved-and-disfigured-police-beating170415

Christy Sims – http://shine.forharriet.com/2015/07/man-found-guilty-of-disfiguring-acid.html?m=1#axzz3gZEAPtKj

Marilyn Stanley – http://globalnews.ca/news/2241810/woman-beaten-scalped-in-vicious-attack-by-ex-boyfriend-and-his-dog/?hootPostID=31c3f878429473aa7f6e41cad665d290

Jane Doe NYC – http://www.rollingstone.com/movies/news/wedding-singer-rapping-granny-ellen-albertini-dow-dead-at-101-20150505

Paris Sashay – http://www.nbcwashington.com/news/local/Female-Comic-Says-Show-Will-Go-on-After-Brutal-Attack-335443831.html?_osource=SocialFlowFB_DCBrand

***Found this to be a powerful resource for survivors of assault – TW for retelling experiences of assault – http://whenwomenrefuse.tumblr.com/***

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